Your life might actually suck.
Yep, how’s that for some powerful coaching? Feel better?
No? I don’t hear the phone ringing; oh all right then. What I mean to say is …
Your life might suck – right now
It might actually suck to be you … right now …. not like a life sentence. It can get better.
My point is that there’s value in seeing and owning your life’s current state of dis-repair. The value comes from getting you clear that even though you may not know what you do want for your life, you know for sure it’s NOT this.
It’s foolish to deny what is, and sometimes what is—is sh!t.
Everyone messes up spectacularly at some point. Your particular car wrecks might include lost jobs, ruined relationships, damaged health, etc.
Sometimes some of these things are irreparable, and trying to put a positive spin on the consequences of irresponsible past action is … well; irresponsible.
It’s also futile because it keeps you stuck in your current situation.
It’s helpful to wallow in the muck a bit
It’s helpful to wallow about in the muck a bit; if only because it really fortifies your will to not cause such crap in your life ever again.
Trying to change your life circumstance before accepting your role in causing your current circumstance will have you see yourself as a victim. Trying to move on without really sitting in the impact of your past actions or inactions on your current situation will keep you stuck.
You’ll be living in your own personal groundhog day—remember the Bill Murray movie—except you won’t have the obvious cues that he had. Your days will actually seem different but underneath you’ll be repeating the same patterns and ensuring that your life circumstance stays in place.
You may be lucky that your life sucks
You’re actually lucky to get that your life sucks; it’s better than the millions of people that live a tranquilized almost drugged existence stuck in some place of bland (not blond) averageness.
At least you are experiencing an extreme, and extremes tend to go both ways—meaning what goes down, can come up and vice-versa.
If you get that you’re in a pit and want to get out, you can harness all of that passion for not wanting what you have to do something about it and catapult yourself right out of that sh&t pit.
It’s harder to escape vanillaness
People that have all their immediate concerns handled have no incentive to go for anything more; that’s too risky.
Why rock the boat when they look around and see that their lives seem much better than most.
It’s hard to change when your life occurs as a big vat of vanilla. Even though they know it’s possible to have a life of infinite flavor and multi-colored sprinkles, there is for them the risk that in shooting for more flavor they could end up in the stinky pit. Why take that risk when you can go for the certainty of vanilla forever. For them it’s really hard to escape from the vanillaness of life.
You at least have the impetus to cause a change and take control of your life because,
You’re not gonna take it anymore!