Tag Archives: acceptance

How could anyone not like me?

My mother and I continue to be amazed: How could anyone not like me?  I mean … meeee!

What’s not to like?

Well there was that very public, lets call it “breakup,” that some people are still talking about.

Then there was that drunken public urination (all over someone’s windscreen with people in the car), and the subsequent completely unrelated fist fight.

But at least that last one was over two-decades ago, and apart from these, I’m drawing a blank on public humiliations.

So why else would people not like me?  Why else, why else?

They don’t like my face

This I have a lot of empathy for.

Been there myself.

Remember that kid in your class when you were 11 or 12 years old, that you just didn’t like?

Why was that?

Sometimes there was a story to accompany the dislike; maybe the kid insulted you or ignored you, or even laughed at you and who got even your friends to laugh at you?  Now that’s reason to hate.

But sometimes it was just that face.

“Hey!  You!  I don’t like your face!”

What’s an appropriate response to that?

The wise or the weak (we called them sissies) headed the other way, the bullies, the overconfident, or the otherwise predisposed to a good altercation would rise to the occasion and then a fight would ensue.

The aftermath would often find positions entrenched, but many times the rather curious result of new respect and friendships would occur.

How weird is that?

But for many, there was never any meeting of the minds or bodies and this undeclared hatred either festered or faded away over time.

Everybody wants to be liked

I clearly would like everyone to like me.

What’s not to like?

But that’s not going to happen.  There are people who don’t like Gandhi, and people who do like Hitler.  Like taste, there’s just no accounting for why people like what they do, and not like what they don’t.

PeterAnthonyGales_likeI console myself by saying, … if they don’t like me (sniff), it’s just because they don’t know me.

Truth is there are things about me that are not likable, and there are things about me that are; and probably a whole number of things about me that won’t move you either way.

I wish people were taught to accept the mixed bag of sweet and sour that we all are.  Taken in pieces you might be lucky to get the sweet, or unlucky to get the sour.

Taken as a whole you get to experience something more akin to the Chinese dish that’s unique and actually quite special.

 

Breakthrough in being with another’s POV

The other day I was having a drink with a good friend of mine and he began to relate his impression of one of the political candidates in the upcoming election.  To say that his view was completely at odds with my own is to put it mildly.  What was really interesting though was thatContinue Reading

Embrace Your Big Fat Ass

Embrace Your Big Fat Ass

You heard me! It’s big, it’s round, it’s talked about, it’s yours. So learn to love it. That’s essentially what “Embracing Your Big Fat Ass: An Owner’s Manual,” is all about. While big fat asses may not be high on your issues list, this funny book is worth a read. The authors (Laura Banks andContinue Reading

Who is this person I’m in a relationship with?

I’m a big fan of the movie Crash because it did an excellent job of illustrating this point:the greatest good and the greatest evil lies within us all. What got me writing about it now is a couple that I know that is going through a rocky period. I’m not going to describe details …Continue Reading

Getting even

Getting even

I am a big proponent of “letting go,” as an essential practice in living my life as a practice. That’s a very challenging thing to do when you grow up in a world that teaches you that there are people who are bad and wrong, and where there is no distinction between the behavior andContinue Reading