Tag Archives: resistance

The Practice of Making People Wrong (Not)

I’m so proud of myself.  Today I came across an article explaining why it’s wasteful to “pre-wash” dishes before putting them in the dishwasher, and I DID NOT send it out to anyone. 

Why is that noteworthy?  Because I realized that my sending it out was my way of being right about and making the Pre-Washers I can think of; wrong.

As part of living life as a practice one of the practices I’ve adopted is the practice of observing and noticing things especially about myself.  I’ve come to notice the tell tale signs of resistance in my body: feeling tense, rigid, my breathing becoming shallow, my mood becoming irritated, my body language closed, often accompanied by an urge to speak out.  Almost every time I give in to that urge I regret it. 

Now that I notice these signs I now look for and see what’s causing these feelings and thoughts of upset in my body.  And it’s horrifying to see the triviality that can upset me?  Someone not seeing an issue the same way I do, someone being confused, something that I don’t understand, somebody walking too slowly/too quickly, someone wearing clothes a certain way, someone talking too loudly; someone wasting time, water and energy by pre-washing dishes before they put them in the dish washer (see … I just did it again), etc.  

Poor petty Peter.

Recently I was house sitting for a friend of mine, and as he was showing me his kitchen I noticed he didn’t have a toaster.  “Oh, I don’t have one,” he said.  “You can use the oven if you need to toast or warm up anything.” 

WRONG! 

That’s just wrong!

Human beings need a steady diet of toast, and melted cheese on bread, and using an oven to do that is inconvenient, wasteful, and just plain wrong.  (smile)

Something like that must happen thirty times a day in my life and those are the ones I catch. Hell, I even notice me making myself wrong for making someone else wrong.   

In almost every instance, there’s no logical reason for me to be upset and make someone wrong.  Why fault someone for being confused, or for wearing their jeans around their knees?   And isn’t it interesting that for almost every instance of me making someone wrong for something, I soon see an instance of me doing exactly the same thing that I made that person wrong for.

So far I haven’t found an antidote for the Make Wrong (MW) disease except maybe for meditation.  I do notice that whenever I am in integrity with my meditation practice I tend to resist less which means fewer instances of making people wrong.  I do have the experience of being more compassionate when I meditate.

There is good news to those of us inflicted with the MW disease though: you can learn to let stuff go.  Try the Sedona Method for help with this.  It’s really a wonderful and easy way to let go of making people wrong and it’s very powerful evil twin brother Being Right (BR).   BR is perhaps the biggest destroyer of relationships known to human kind.  We will end relationships with siblings, parents, sons and daughters to be right.  People kill to be right.  Ok this is another post.  For now I hope this helps you see where and how often you make people wrong. 

Try the Sedona method if you want help in not doing that.  And I won’t make you wrong if you don’t.  😉

Rain, Rain, Rain

Whoever said, “Into every life a little rain must fall,” knew what she was talking about; but this is ridiculous.  It’s rained almost every day since I’ve been here in Trinidad and yesterday it rained all day – much of it torrential.  On the narrow congested road to where my parents live, there were partsContinue Reading

Embrace Your Big Fat Ass

Embrace Your Big Fat Ass

You heard me! It’s big, it’s round, it’s talked about, it’s yours. So learn to love it. That’s essentially what “Embracing Your Big Fat Ass: An Owner’s Manual,” is all about. While big fat asses may not be high on your issues list, this funny book is worth a read. The authors (Laura Banks andContinue Reading

Your relationship to the way things are

Fundamental practice #1 is to observe and notice. Start paying attention to your relationship to the way things are: the government, the environment, getting ahead, making money, your mother, your husband etc. Do you notice you have a set story or conversation about all of these things? What’s your conversation about each of them? PayContinue Reading

Learning to let go

I use the word “learning” instead of “learn” because letting go is an art that you will spend your life practicing. Yet this is nothing to be discouraged about. The whole idea of living your life as a practice is that there is no final state of perfection. You always can improve. Letting go isContinue Reading