We couldn’t possibly remain conscious to every choice we have in any given minute, hour or day so we invent routines, rituals, traditions, standard practices and jobs to relieve us of the effort of continually making conscious choices.

This is helpful but has one major drawback:

namely,

getting so used to our automatic-pilot default choices that

we forget our power to choose.

groundhog in holeThis often leaves us trapped in our own Groundhog Day for years or decades, before we reach some crisis—like old age, or sickness— and realising that we wish we had made a (different) choice a long time ago.

Failing to recognise and exercise our power of choice leaves us unable to cope when breakdowns occur or new situations arise.

We come to feel that we have no choice.

We always have a choice

Never forget that we always have choice, and never confuse the choice we feel we must make … with not having any choice at all. fork in d road

Yes you may have shitty options at the moment, but when faced with a breakdown that presents only shitty options now, you can invent choices that affect your future and the best choices you have are

.. to Plan

Planning is THE forgotten choice.

We take steps we justifiably feel compelled to take, but we can always choose to plan a way out. People who hate their jobs and feel that they have no choice, have no plan to change their situation in the future.

No wonder they hate their jobs and the choice they feel they must make every day. They have no plan for escape.

With no anticipation of a new future—like the upcoming vacation to Cancun—there is nothing to light these people up.  They are irritable, depressed, angry, frustrated.

Truly unpleasant people to be around.  irritated baby face

Like the child in the picture, they don’t see the future of possibility within their grasp.  Consequently, they make no plan to realise it.

… (to ask for) Help

helping creative commonsThis is the other choice we forget we have.

We are social beings defined by our living with, loving and helping other human beings. We cannot be human otherwise. Asking for help is a choice very few of us make … until it’s too late.

If you’re feeling shut down, trapped and like you have no choice, reach out … You’re not alone and you’re not the first person to feel this way.

  • You’re not the only seemingly put-together, successful person to feel trapped, lost or like a fraud.
  • You’re not the only person to feel like they’re in a dead-end job, with no future, no options but to work to take care of obligations.
  • You’re not the only person to feel trapped in an unhappy relationship.

You always have a powerful choice available to you … you just need to face it.

What choice are you not making?